Blog Posts

Max Cool Time Travel

If scientists eventually figure out time travel, I reckon I’ll use it more for mundane occurrences, than for big stuff. For example, I would go back to Tuesday last week and stop myself from foolishly putting this block of cream cheese in the freezer. What makes this occurrence particularly annoying is that I knew that… Continue reading Max Cool Time Travel

Locked Up

It was my first year at Uni. My friend, Penelope (obviously not her real name because which Nigerian parents name their child Penelope? ‘Penelope’ is currently married with a kid so it felt right to change her name) and I had decided to go see a movie with our current beaus, Mohammed and Rotimi. They… Continue reading Locked Up

Children- The How (Part 2.)

  So now that you have chosen to have children. How do you want to have them? Yes, there is more than one way and this, in my opinion, should be a choice as well. I love Gabrielle Union-Wade, I really do, but I’ve been reading about what she went through trying to have children by her… Continue reading Children- The How (Part 2.)

Children- The Why

I have been thinking for a while now that we need to open up the child rearing conversation. We need to take it as a thing and critically dissect all aspects of the ‘project’, as a friend of mine recently referred to it. First off, especially in these parts (I write from Lagos, Nigeria), we… Continue reading Children- The Why

Lotje

“Ughhh Wole, why do we have to go so early”, I grumbled as I rolled over in bed and covered my head with a fluffy white pillow. The year was 2015, and the place was Cape Town, South Africa. I was on holiday with a friend of mine, Wole, who at the time lived in… Continue reading Lotje

Finding Authentic

I recently left my 9- 5 so I could read a novel all day, and not feel guilty. I consider myself to be on a journey to find authenticity, and this is my yardstick, my measure; I will know I have reached my destination when I read a novel in the middle of the day-… Continue reading Finding Authentic

Say Yes

“You are my life; my entire world. You came into my life and made every past disappointment make sense. I cannot imagine a forever without you. Marry me Uju. Please, marry me.” I stand there, stunned, like I did not know this was going to happen. But I did see it coming, I did- when… Continue reading Say Yes

She

Photo by ‘Dania She. Resplendent. Delicate. Powerful. She. Terrifying in her majesty. She. The clouds, the wind, the earth- they align for her. She dances a still dance before them. She. Those who know, know that she is not unhelped. They see beneath her surface to His all-powerful hands keeping her rooted. She. When she… Continue reading She

Freedom Lives Here

I remember a feeling of freedom from when I was younger. Not like I did not have any troubles- there were crushes to be had, and boarding school scandals to deal with- but it was never heavy; never more than what it was- a crush on a yellow boy, or punishment from a senior to… Continue reading Freedom Lives Here

Perfect

Photo by Afoma Umesi Perfect. That’s what they are; in that time, in that moment. Forever. Whatever state they are, in whichever season- winter, summer, spring, autumn, dry, rainy. They change with the seasons, and whatever they become with each season is beautiful and perfect, for that season. Because it is not about them in… Continue reading Perfect

Demon Angel

(May 2016) My every encounter with you leaves me bruised Needing to heal all over again Sometimes it’s intended, sometimes it isn’t Perhaps it’s not multiple wounds, but just the one The one which has refused to heal But is constantly covered up by dead skin Every encounter with you, peeling off the dead skin… Continue reading Demon Angel

Why

“I do not know that I want to have children.” I will always remember the look on his face when I said this to him, that first day we met- part awe, part…something. Something being a mix of crestfallen (because, otherwise, you’re perfect), and wary (because, what horror stories does this one have that she… Continue reading Why

Truth

  “I didn’t believe you yesterday.” She handed him the glass – whisky, one ice cube away from being neat- and folded herself neatly beside him on the grey couch. The smoke from the cigar he cradled between his right index and middle fingers swirled up and away, as if running from the uncomfortableness of… Continue reading Truth

Heavy

I was a heavy heart to carry, my beloved was weighed down                                                                              -Florence + The Machine  … Continue reading Heavy

Write

(to the beat of an Aṣíkò) “Write.” Why, because you think it would be about you? “Write.” What do you imagine? That I would express deep words of affection that I’m unable to say to your face? “Write.” Is this what you think? “Write.” What you expect? “Write.” What you want? “Write.” What about, exactly?… Continue reading Write

Of Healing and Staying Healed

You’re healed. You’re eating again, smiling again, taking pleasure in the little things; even glowing. Your friends say you’re glowing. Books are interesting again, Music is rhythmic again. Love is desired again, and no longer banished forever. These days when you laugh, no sorrow falls out. But out of the blue he texts you. Something… Continue reading Of Healing and Staying Healed

Bystanding Bystanders

    25th August, 2011 10, Adebambo Street, Surulere, Lagos 8:05pm   It had been such a good day. At first when she’d come, there had been the initial awkwardness, but that soon dissipated in the comfortability of their easy conversation. The kiss this time didn’t feel as strange as the first few times; as… Continue reading Bystanding Bystanders

Love Is

Hey Guys, So this is the last piece in the Return Mail II pie :) Thank you to all the writers for sending in their pieces. This literally wouldn’t have happened without you guys. My piece is a tad long. Okay, not a tad, more like a lot. But hey, I’m going to take the… Continue reading Love Is

You

Hi. Hi. Hi, you’re Shy. Shyer than I. I don’t know why. Why I followed. Followed to say hi. Hi. Hi, I’m not shy. Shyness is a façade I put up. Up in view of everyone. Everyone knows. Knows I’m loud. Loud as your laugh. Laugh like a baby. Baby you do, true. True words… Continue reading You

Because

Lol. Where to start? As it is doing me? How is it doing me? “I will love you faithfully, forever unconditionally…” You make promises and then you break them. Always. Forever. Like you control life. No matter what. Through it all; Like you even know what that means. Or maybe you do. But you don’t… Continue reading Because

This Means War

Me: I really cannot stand a long distance relationship. I can’t stand being unable to touch the one I love. You: I feel like you think of me as an object, like the only times I feel like we are connected is when you touch me. You: How can you stay so long without talking to me?… Continue reading This Means War

Made To Love You

I wanna know what love is I want you to show me I wanna feel what Love is I know you can show me… I have loved not once, not twice, but it never felt this right. This is different. This is special. This is an I-hate-how-much-I-love-you kinda love. It’s love with no boundaries, love… Continue reading Made To Love You

Fuck Love

Fuck love. I’m tired of trying. No. This isn’t an attempt to sound pained when I’m not. It’s also not an invitation to a pity party; they’re just the best lines that describe my feelings towards love at the moment. It’s amazing how a space of one year can completely change your outlook on stuff,… Continue reading Fuck Love

Return Mail II: Intro

Hey Guys, As with its predecessor, Return Mail II sort of just happened. I don’t need to say much by way of introduction because the same rules, methodology and almost everything else from last year apply. Here’s a link to that intro: Return Mail: The Intro Ten of us wrote last year, but this year… Continue reading Return Mail II: Intro

Alabaster Box

I love you Lord You make me strong I’m so grateful for your love More than anything in my life, I’m grateful for our relationship Just knowing that there’s that safe place that’s always got me That I can crawl into your lap even when I don’t understand That you find ways to make every… Continue reading Alabaster Box

Man Of My Dreams

Her yellow sun dress swished lightly as she sat at her desk. Thoughtfully, she selected her weapons of choice; a black pen and a plain white note pad. There would be nothing flowery about what she was about to do. Pen poised, she stared at the blank sheet and waited for the beginning to come… Continue reading Man Of My Dreams

Nimble

I’ve just had an epiphany; I cannot marry him. I cannot marry him because he says ‘nimble’. ‘Nimble’ as opposed to ‘nibble’ (e.g “Would you like proper dinner, or just something you can nimble on?”) I’m afraid that if I go on ahead and marry him, a few years down the line when he’s stopped… Continue reading Nimble

Return Mail: Happy Ending

Hey Baby, Guess what I’m doing? Well, you don’t have to guess. I’m writing you a letter. Duh. ‘Why?’ you’re wondering. I have no idea. I could very email you or text you or something or a kiss smiley would pretty convey everything this letter will only in fewer words. The thing is, I love… Continue reading Return Mail: Happy Ending

Return Mail: 6519; 10491

“Love is patient…” I’m sorry, but yeah how about I say fuck that. It’s been almost a year of waiting, hoping, that someday you would be here and we would both drink in the same air. A year of waiting for the opportunity to look into your eyes and search your pupils for the imprint… Continue reading Return Mail: 6519; 10491

Return Mail: This Place

Easy. That’s this place that we’ve come to. Although if you think about it, we’ve kinda always been easy. Settling into each other and flowing seemingly seamlessly. Comfortable is another word I would use to describe this place, but the word has sort of become associated with old, married boring couples, and that we’re not.… Continue reading Return Mail: This Place

Return Mail: Hold My Hand

Temi, My own. I always said I was going to call the person I get married to Temi. The reason was because I didn’t want to ‘share’ the name. Didn’t want to ‘prostitute’ my name (for want of a better word). But this name? It’s yours. I’m sure. It’s how the name was yours before… Continue reading Return Mail: Hold My Hand

Return Mail: Grudgingly Yours

I don’t believe there are good humans; I think we are all innately evil. I don’t believe in charity, I think it’s done for self-exultation. It makes you feel good about yourself, doesn’t it? I don’t believe there’s true altruism. I don’t believe you can be happy forever. I don’t believe there’s much hope for… Continue reading Return Mail: Grudgingly Yours

Return Mail: I Knew

Dearest Kanyinsola, Lol. I’ve always wanted to write those words side by side. Funny how I’m only just doing it for the first time after almost one year. Ok, ok, so let me start this all over again. Hey B :) I know, I know… But technically, ‘B’ isn’t the same as ‘Babe’ right? :D… Continue reading Return Mail: I Knew

Return Mail: Dear Love

Dear love, Fuck you. First of all. Cupid? Really? No, really? You entrust your affairs to the hands of a be-diapered infant with an arrow in his hands? You musta lost your goddamn mind. What actually is your game plan? No tell me. Seriously. You start out…interesting. I mean you’re fun and quirky and different.… Continue reading Return Mail: Dear Love

Return Mail

I’m excited!!! Okay, not ‘three exclamation marks excited’. Maybe two or one. Ah well, what does it matter. I read a ‘love letter’ the other day that was…nice. Properly constructed, with nice-sounding rhymes, words, etc. But for some reason, it didn’t get to me. Felt quite alien. After re-reading, I realised the problem; the letter… Continue reading Return Mail

My Perfection

Some people find it in tall, dark and handsome; Some others, in father figures. To the deprived girl, the one with the fattest of pockets; And to the needy one, the jealous one. * I’ve found it in you; In the way your eyes light u when I show up And in the hard cushion… Continue reading My Perfection

You

I Like: Male Watches. Statement Necklaces. Quirky Jewelry. Romance Writing. RomComs. The Colour Brown. Seeing Arsenal Win. Writing (sometimes). Ellen. Cooking. The Colour Orange. Ice Cream. Quaint Apartments. Interior Design. Faded Ripped Jeans. Slouchy Tees. Scuffed Sneakers. Messy Hair. Afros. Your Hair. Music. Your Taste In Music. Cuddling. Goes Without Saying. Candid Photographs. Big Sunglasses.… Continue reading You

Interlude

Hey Guys, Apologies for not being as consistent as we agreed. I would blame my third world location but alas, I am the bigger ‘man’. I did write something on TNC in the For Coloured Women series. In case you didn’t read it, you can do so here: Me and My Beige Soul Also. I’d… Continue reading Interlude

Lost

I’m so lost. And for the first time in a long time I feel alone. The pain welcomes me like an old friend. I shrink from it and embrace it at the same time. It is familiar. I’d hoped I’d never be here again. I lost you today. They say it is better to have… Continue reading Lost

no Fancy Words or Flowery Speak (1): Jacks Are Better

…Day 4… ‘Jacks are better’ What does that even mean? Isn’t Jack somebody’s name first, before being whiskey? Advertising has always been such a funny form of art. I’m in my spot at the corner of the bar. The one that faces the aforementioned ‘Jacks Are Better’ poster. Laptop and blackberry plugged in. Glass of… Continue reading no Fancy Words or Flowery Speak (1): Jacks Are Better

Well.You know h…

Well. You know how you need to make a call but somehow, things keep getting in the way or you keep putting it off, and then the longer it takes, the more awkward it will be when/if you eventually make the call? Yeah. That. This is awkward. *observes awkward moment* *awkward moment over* So. I… Continue reading Well.You know h…

AGIDIGBA

I finally wrote a story :) The Naked Convos Enjoy.

Inexplicable

You said I made you smile. That your cheesy smile that made you look nineteen. God, I miss that smile. You said I did inexplicable things to your insides. I.N.E.X.P.L.I.C.A.B.L.E. I remember how I loved the way that sounded at the time. Now I wish you had explained; I should have forced you to explain.… Continue reading Inexplicable

Always. Always.

Hello. I would apologise for my prolonged absence, but seeing as I cannot say that I’m back, I think I shall hold off on the apologies. I took a break from writing and everything else for the Christmas holiday and it appears that my ‘inspiration’ hasn’t gotten the resumption memo yet. I’m sure my recent… Continue reading Always. Always.

The Audacity To Breathe

Hey Guys, Happy New Year! Or not. We’re all aware of our government’s attempt to ruin the new year for us and the recent protests happening all over the country. The views expressed in this piece The Audacity To Breathe mostly summarize my thoughts on the issue. Please take out time to read, share and… Continue reading The Audacity To Breathe

This Is Me

Happy Holidays people! I would apologise for not writing in a while but seeing as I don’t plan on writing anytime soon (its Christmas yo!) I won’t. I do have a couple of posts lined up (some from guests, others from my archives) so I’ll be putting them up from time to time. Meanwhile, you… Continue reading This Is Me

The Single Story: Tell Me.

This one is written by my soulsister, the beautiful (of looks and of pen) ‘Pemi Aguda (@UberBetty). ******************************* You’ve probably lost someone before. By lost, I mean to death. You’ve probably lost someone to death before. Can you tell me how it works? Can you tell me what to say? Please tell me what to… Continue reading The Single Story: Tell Me.

Homecoming

Another one for me. But then which one of me? I’m not sure; the lines have become blurred. Journey into integration and self discovery? Or gradual descent into abhorred normalcy? Enjoy. ******************* You need to find me. This mind is bursting at the seams with conversations unhad, fights unfought, and lies untold. Why do you… Continue reading Homecoming

Dear Mr. President

Dear Mr. President, You need to light up Nigeria already! When will you understand that Nigeria will NEVER be able to compete with other nations without power? That steady power supply drives everything? That Nigerian students will never be able to compete on a global scale when they’re stuck studying obsolete text books by candle… Continue reading Dear Mr. President

The Valse Of Death

Amidst the crowd, their eyes locked Amidst the chatter, their minds talked Dance with me, she invited. And even though his hands were full, There was no way in hell he could refuse The song was one they’d heard before The style was one they’d won prizes for But as their hands came together, Their… Continue reading The Valse Of Death

Judging George.

Hey Guys. I know, I know. But I’ve been mega busy, what with a new city and landlords and teaching and CDS… I do have stories in my head and will put them down and post soon enough. In the meantime, you can catch some of my work here: Dania on Daily Times    … Continue reading Judging George.

Birthday Blues

This piece was written by my friend, the prolific ‘Jibola Lawal. Its beauty is not in the story itself but in its telling; it reads like a peaceful flowing river with gentle waves. Enjoy. What’s your earliest memory? I don’t know how it’s possible that anyone can remember that far back with such clarity. But… Continue reading Birthday Blues

Long Goodbye

“I love you.” We are snuggled on the couch in my living room. My favourite love songs collection is playing on the stereo and he is whispering sweet nothings in my ear in between songs. These are my favorite moments: when we sit and just be. I smile. “That’s kind.” I feel his smile. I… Continue reading Long Goodbye

Ayomikun

Based on a true story. Sade could not sit still. She just could not. She had a good feeling about this one. This was it; she was finally pregnant. Her hitherto punctual, albeit annoying, period was late by two weeks. Earlier in the day, she had driven into the pharmacy on her way home from… Continue reading Ayomikun

The Single Story (Intro)

Hey Guys. So. There seems to be a ‘series’ trend going round blogsville.   Well I couldn’t carry last now could I? A whole ‘Dania? Mba nu.   Seriously though.   I am starting a series. It is called ‘The Single Story’. And no it wasn’t birthed out of my desire to not carry last.… Continue reading The Single Story (Intro)

The Things I’m Not Allowed To Say But I’ll Go On Ahead And Say Them Anyway Because, What Do You Know, It’s My Mouth. Or My Fingers More Like.

Of course it’s a rant, what was your first clue? The title? Or the fact that I’ve just spent three weeks in a refugee camp? Oh sorry did I say refugee? I meant refugee. Sigh. Where to begin…where to begin? Perhaps I should start by telling you how we’re expected to drop irons, water heaters,… Continue reading The Things I’m Not Allowed To Say But I’ll Go On Ahead And Say Them Anyway Because, What Do You Know, It’s My Mouth. Or My Fingers More Like.

Mea Culpa

Hey Guys.   I’ve been AWOL for almost a month and for that i sincerely apologise. It was not my intention to stay away that long but i’ve been mega busy plus i’ve been doing a lot of introspection/incubation type things. I even skipped town for a bit.   I’d like to say that i… Continue reading Mea Culpa

Why Won’t You Protect Me?

Okay people, first things first:   Happy Birthday to ME!!!!   So. That said. If you like what you see on this here blog, Please nominate and subsequently vote for Chronicles of Dania in the Nigerian Blog Awards by taking time out to fill the nomination form here http://www.nigerianblogawards.com/register.php Please remember to fill in the blog… Continue reading Why Won’t You Protect Me?

To The Corner

He smiled. She froze. She knew that smile; knew what was coming. “Go to the corner.” As she dragged her feet to the corner of the spacious moderately furnished living room, she let out a heavy sigh and tried to remember a time when things had been different. She couldn’t. Not really. She sank to… Continue reading To The Corner

I See You

So I’m in an extremely mushy soapy cheesy mood as I write this. You’ve been warned. -____-     Hey babe. No this isn’t me apologizing for something I’ve done. Or I’m about to do. This is another one of ’em love letters. You can roll your eyes all you want, I know you love… Continue reading I See You

BareNaked.

The cool night breeze blew across her face. She closed her eyes and inhaled. She could smell it coming. She started twisting her waist slowly to the beat of the Konga. She doesn’t remember much of the childhood. Maybe because there is not much to remember. She remembers a bit of the teenage years though.… Continue reading BareNaked.

Adieu

I remember you my friend. Today I remember you. You saved me from boredom many a time. You always had something fun for me to do. I didn’t always treat you right, didn’t take care of you like I should have. But you stood by me still. Some people didn’t like our friendship. They said… Continue reading Adieu

Hello.

*ring ring* *ring ring* I knew she was out of my league. Not way out but a little out. With her perfect features and charming smile. With her wit and intelligence. Don’t get me wrong, I’m not an ogre or troll-like in nature. Far from it. I’m good looking; some may even go as far… Continue reading Hello.

WHAT IF?

Heaven and Hell. I’ve heard a lot of arguments about these. Whether or not they’re real. What you have to do (or not do) to get into either. I’m not here to debate. But pause. Think about it for a minute. What if? Just what if they’re real? What if there really is a burning… Continue reading WHAT IF?

FREEFALL.

I rarely feature guest writers but I saw this and I knew I just had to share it. We call ourselves ‘Soul Sisters’ because we find that we are similar in a lot of ways. Her writing however, is imbued with such beauty as I can only applaud from a distance. Ladies and Gentlemen, I… Continue reading FREEFALL.

BRING IT ON.

Go on; open up that bottle of Veuve Clicquot. Pour yourself a glass. No, not that thin-stemmed sissy champagne flute. The long wide tumbler. Now take a nice long sip. Close your eyes. Relax. Let the rich sour taste sink in. That’s it, there you go. Ignore the flashing red indicator light of your blackberry.… Continue reading BRING IT ON.

PERHAPS?

My first official post on WordPress. Took me long enough. No it’s not a story. Some of you will be offended (I recommend Sprite) Some of you will be amused. When you’re done with all of that, perhaps you can set aside all that emotion and reason with me? Perhaps? I have never laid claim… Continue reading PERHAPS?

KILL ME. NOW.

>Hey Guys,Two things:1) It is with heaviness in my heart and deep sadness that i make this announcement. I have given in. I have sold out. I’m moving my blog to WordPress :'( I was hoping to hit a particular number of page views before i moved but…Blogger served me well but WordPress is more… Continue reading KILL ME. NOW.

NO.

>He moved over her, anchoring his weight on his elbows. She sighed. It had been a long day and she really just wanted to sleep. He began to kiss her lips and she decided to let him, at least for a while. She splayed her fingers on his bare chest, and kissed him back. Maybe… Continue reading NO.

The Smart Kids.

> Okay, lets talk politics. It doesn’t matter if you don’t take an interest in politics; politics will take an interest in you. -Pericles For about 3 months, I’ve listened to (and made) various comments on all the politics going on in the country (Nigeria) at the moment. Twitter has a way of making people… Continue reading The Smart Kids.

*SIGH*

>06:05pm “Babe? Hey babe.” Ahh. His Voice. Still has that calming effect even after three years of being together (Two years dating, one year married).“I’m okay, you?” Lord knows i’d kill for a hug right now.“Seriously babe, I’m okay. Just had a pretty long rough day.”“Yeah of course, i’ll tell you all about it when… Continue reading *SIGH*

OLN

>So I was going through my previous posts and I realised that the last three have been pretty serious. Like seriously, why so serious?? I’m usually not a serious person like that so those posts have me worried. Very worried. Like does it mean I am now an adult? Older and wiser and things? Does… Continue reading OLN

The Noses and Horses.

>22nd August 2006.5.00pm…TICK…TICK…TICKGreen. Please God let it be green. Dear God…Tick, tick, tick…Blue.Shit.“Buife! Nwanyibuife!”“Yes mum!”“Are you okay? You’ve been in there for quite a while.”“I’m fine mum.”“Okay, I’m going to the supermarket, do you want to come along?”“No mum, I’m pretty tired. I think I’ll just rest a while.”“Okay, see you soon. Are you sure… Continue reading The Noses and Horses.

To Think is To Differ

> When I was born, my ears were pierced; I was a girl; that was the norm. Growing up, I was taught to always use my right hand. Using my left was rude. I was told that looking at someone older than you in the face was disrespectful. Of course I had to be in… Continue reading To Think is To Differ

I AM NOT HIM.

My name is Seun Adams. I turned 23 today and I should be excited about it but I’m not. I’m not because exactly 10 years ago today, on my 13th birthday to be precise, my life as I knew it changed. I come from a regular Christian family of five; father, mother, two siblings. I’m… Continue reading I AM NOT HIM.

OH NO HE DIDN’T!!!

So Valentine’s day has come and gone. Is it just me or was there an unusual amount of fuss attached to it this year? If I’d gotten one more, just one more, Valentine hamper BBM broadcast I’d have smashed my blackberry. I’m sure. Even though I didn’t get a Range Rover (still can’t get over… Continue reading OH NO HE DIDN’T!!!