Cryptic, Mushful, Verse Form

Homecoming

Another one for me.
But then which one of me?
I’m not sure; the lines have become blurred.
Journey into integration and self discovery?
Or gradual descent into abhorred normalcy?

Enjoy.

*******************

You need to find me.

This mind is bursting at the seams with conversations unhad, fights unfought, and lies untold. Why do you tarry so? Don’t you think of me too? Do you not miss me at nights? Or do you already tell someone else the insignificant parts about your day? Do you allow her to hold you and cradle your head in her bosom?

Tell me, do you?

She doesn’t bother me though. She’s not the one and you know it. She’s everything you thought you wanted but you still balk inwardly when she talks future. You can’t picture having our children with her. Or perhaps you do see the picture but there’s something wrong with it and you can’t put your finger on it.

That’s because you need to put your fingers on me.

These breasts are full, waiting. These arms ache from the emptiness. See how these lips are permanently pursed? They have become stiff from needing to be kneaded. This skin tingles just at the thought of you. Not when he dares to touch. Or when the other one thinks his words are so hot. No, not any of them. Just you.

Only you.

I’m done with all of them. I can’t keep it up anymore. I’m tired. Of the ones who have your look and not your heart. Of the ones who have your mind but not your smile. Of the ones who are you but are not mine. Mine. My own. Nkem. Why do you tarry so? Surely you’re not in collusion with the universe to punish me?

It was never my intent.

Yes there is a jar that bears my name. A porcelain jar. I did not ask for it but I understand that I must be punished for its contents. But isn’t my punishment a bit severe considering that I mostly didn’t ask for those hearts? This ache underneath the ice façade…this hollow…surely it’s enough?

Enough.

Dude. You need to find me already.

50 thoughts on “Homecoming”

  1. I feel like u spoke wiv my voice. :( These words I’m tired of whispering 2 myself, night after cold night; day after boring day. The other day I told a friend when ‘he’ finally shows up i’km probli gonna punch him in the gonads right after I’ve sucked his face off wivv the KissThat’llLast4eva. “Dude, u need 2 find me already.” :(

    Like

  2. Babe, this is my exact state of mind. U knw d point where u ask: #DearFutureHusbandiThinkYouAreMadAbiYouWantMeToDateAllTheBoysBeforeYouCome :|

    The wait haf taya me!

    Luv d way u put it in2 words. Classic.

    Like

  3. OluwaJezuz!

    All my gehs are going with the strawberry these days. It’s not safe anymore in these word-smithing boroughs. I should wise up and latch up to one of ’em strawberry swings for my very own taste of the sugarcane.

    What is wrong with all of you?!

    Like

  4. “These breasts are full, waiting. These arms ache from the emptiness…” That did it for me! The hammer that struck! Oh, I am coming already!

    I like this writer for one particular reason: Miserly with her words. Like they are marbles, rare marbles. Simple, but every character has to mean something.

    I’d stop now, for I have to read it over and over again.

    Like

  5. The path your posts has taken lately. . .
    I like. .
    A bit off. .unique. .
    But very deep

    This one. .more story. .very nice!

    Like

  6. I can’t begin to tell how much I like this piece.

    This is brilliant. This is beautiful.

    And from one of my favourite / most talented authors.

    May you find, Dania darling; if only because you have set your heart steadfast to wait. May he find you quickly lest he risk a kick in the groin.

    Like

    1. Hahahaha!

      Shhhhh…not too loudly, we don’t want to scare him off. Hey, if you’re seeing this, I won’t kick too hard. I promise.

      Liberal with your praise as always dear Kola.

      Thank you :)

      Like

  7. Diary of a conceited woman. She probably thinks she’s all that and more. Hopefully she wakes up and smells the coffee.

    There’s a way you write. I’m still trying to get my head around it.

    Like

  8. Seeing as I got this link in my DM. I know its real.

    Don’t tell me you got it in yours too.

    Love you Dania..and this..THIS..THIS IS.

    Like

  9. *sighs* so tired of the frogs mehn, when shall my prince get here.
    tired of the merry go round………..i need a permanent stop already,

    but good things come to those that errrmmmmm wait……..
    waiting patiently :D

    Like

  10. my mind is bursting at the seams with conversations unhad, fights unfought, even lies untold…or do you already tell someone else the insignificant parts about your day?……….you so beautifully described the way i feel with those lines of yours.. you are a beautiful writer Dania. i “gbadun” you plenty.

    Like

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